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RIYADH, Saudi Arabia — For insight into these head-spinning times in Saudi Arabia, where the ultraconservative social and religious codes that micromanage daily life seem to spring a new leak every month — women driving! Usher and Akon rapping to sold-out crowds! I hope this place get closed permanently. The issue was the decision that made Nabt Fenjan a daring outpost of the new Riyadh: Originally opened only for women , the coffee shop began allowing male and female customers to mix in late Men enter through separate doors and pay in separate lines; women sometimes eat behind partitions to ensure privacy from male strangers.
In early December, however, the government announced that businesses would no longer be required to segregate customers — the latest expansion of the social reforms initiated by the de facto Saudi ruler, Crown Prince Mohammed bin Salman. Yet Nabt Fenjan was far from the only Saudi establishment to discreetly drop separate sections over the last few years, after the crown prince defanged the religious police , which once enforced conservative social norms.
Nor was it the only place to thrive partly as a result. And, perhaps, with the many Saudis who have studied abroad in cities with single-origin coffee bean fetishes. Notwithstanding Mr. Some women whose families might previously have allowed them to work only in the privacy of offices, if at all, now hold barista jobs. Saudis can now mingle with the opposite sex not only at home but also at movie theaters, concerts and even wrestling matches.
These signifiers are products of the last ten years, smartphones and virtual social networking, and cultural icons like Bob Marley and Kim Kardashian. But in Saudi Arabia, an isolated Wahhabist paradise — and the largest and wealthiest country in the Middle East — these abbreviative signs are handy rhetorical devices for tapping into an unrestrained subculture while under the seemingly inescapable gaze of government censors.
But then again, most products of modern life, particularly American culture, are. In the modern nation-state — be it liberal or Wahhabist — law-making is myth-making, and legal jargon, enforced by lashes and the death penalty, is fodder for the Saudi government, whose interests lie in maintaining the integrity and validity of the national imaginary.
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In Saudi Arabia’s rigid past, religious police once swooped down on rose sellers and anyone peddling red paraphernalia around Valentine’s Day, but now a more open — albeit risky — dating culture is taking root. Pursuing relationships outside of marriage in the conservative Islamic kingdom once amounted to a death wish, and would-be Romeos resorted to pressing phone numbers up against their car window in hope of making contact with women.
Now a sweeping liberalization drive — which has rendered the religious police toothless and allowed gender mixing like never before — has made it easier for young couples to meet in cafes and restaurants. Well-heeled millennials also hunt for romantic liaisons via Twitter and Snapchat, and apps such as Swarm — designed to log places the user visits but often repurposed to look for dates. Pre-marital relationships remain a cultural minefield though in a country steeped in Islamic tradition and where matchmaking is typically overseen by family elders, forcing couples to keep unsanctioned romance under wraps.
RIYADH, Saudi Arabia — Women in Saudi Arabia will no longer need to accompanied by male relatives, and “singles” sections for just men.
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Long forbidden, dating has arrived in the ultra-conservative Gulf kingdom with some Saudis meeting and marrying without the help of relatives. Well-heeled millennials meet via Tinder, Snapchat, Twitter and Instagram. The pair finally met in person in Egypt, where gender mixing is more accepted than in Saudi Arabia, long dominated by a puritanical form of Islam that has been challenged recently by Crown Prince Mohammed bin Salman’s push toward a more moderate interpretation of the religion.
Because sex and romantic love remain highly controversial subjects in the kingdom, interviewees spoke to NBC News on condition of anonymity, and pseudonyms have been used. While there have been noticeable social changes recently, men and women who are not closely related still traditionally don’t mix, and some avoid even looking at an unrelated person of the opposite sex. Girls and boys are educated separately, and workplaces that employ women are nominally segregated.
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Sitting on a street in Riyadh is an elderly, bearded man whose voice betrays a longing for the past. Asked about his past, Ibrahim his name, as well as those of the other interviewees, has been changed to ensure his safety squirms uncomfortably. He prefers not to look at women; during our conversation his gaze is directed elsewhere. Nor does he open up when asked what he thinks about the fact that the patrols are losing their power.
We were like soldiers; we did what we were told. I have no personal opinion on the subject. They took a beautiful thing, religion, and created a distorted version of it. Fifteen girls died and many others were injured. Or maybe he was referring to a case in which patrol personnel burst into the home of a person who was suspected of consuming alcohol and beat him to death. These stories, dating back more than a decade, now seem like ancient history. The modesty patrols indeed belong to the past.
He prohibited them from patrolling the streets, detaining passersby, demanding to see their IDs and harassing them. In practice, they disappeared, and today the organization exists only on paper. As of last month, Israel too is permitting its citizens to visit Saudi Arabia , and not only for pilgrimage to Mecca.
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Pursuing relationships outside of marriage in the kingdom once amounted to a death wish and selling red roses was like selling drugs. Now a sweeping liberalization drive allowed gender mixing has made it easier for young couples to meet in cafes and restaurants. Pre-marital relationships remain a cultural minefield. Covert dating operations illustrate how Saudi Arabia’s mainly young population is often compelled to lead dual lives in the pursuit of social liberties that may outstrip the kingdom’s capacity for change.
Saudi society is more open, but everyone lies about relationships because people are judgemental.
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